Lazy headline writing

It's no secret that the quality of journalism has declined dramatically in the Internet era--largely because of the constant pressure to add fresh content and get "clicks and eyeballs."

However, taking a moment to clarify the most important part of your article--the headline--is always worthwhile. Here is an example of a lazy headline from an Associated Press story as it appears on Yahoo (incidentally, Yahoo probably has the worst content aggregators and story presentations in the business, although I am not sure Yahoo News counts as journalism).

Penn State figures accused of lying head to court

Maybe I am the dummy, because it took me three reads to make sense of what the story was about, although I have been loosely following the PSU case. "Penn State" is the good opening hook, but "figures" is a double-meaning word, made even worse by the fact that one meaning is a verb and another is a noun. "Penn State figures" could mean "Penn State expects." So you have to go to "figures accused" and that throws a hiccup into the reader's understanding.

Then you get the "lying head." Is the head lying on a pillow? "Figures accused of lying head." Huh?

This isn't an egregious offense to written communication and meaning, but it is an example of how unclear word use and inattentive word order serve as roadblocks. No doubt some people breeze right through and translate it instantly into coherency, but in a world of many content choices, wouldn't you want an inviting doorway?

When I was a carpenter, we had a saying, "Measure twice, cut once." Sounds like good advice for writing, too.

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The Myth of Book Marketing: Be Unconventional

By Scott Nicholson

I've decided to use this blog for my "writing babble" stuff to keep it separate from my regular blog , since very few humans on the planet care about write babble except for writers.

I've been known for my uncoventional views on writing and publishing, which I hold and follow for one reason only: convention is failure. Convention in writing is frustration, rejection, and invisibility. So who needs that?

My own small success is directly attributable to abandoning all the conventional wisdom I'd absorbed over the years. The most veteran writers usually gave the most awful advice (get an agent, write to market, never self-publish). Heck, I even dished out some of that crap myself.

So, with the premise that I am insane and you won't hear this kind of advice anywhere else, proceed at your own risk here. Today's lesson is: book marketing is not book marketing.

The first thing a new indie writer hears is "You have to be on Facebook, you have to Tweet 20 times a day, you need an established platform." Sure, it's helpful if you already have an audience of some sort. But dumping one book out there and pushing and pushing does nothing, because as the brilliant Robin Sullivan points out, "Once you roll the stone up the hill, it's just going to roll back over you."

As an example, let's examine the three biggest indie success stories, the ones conventional wisdom says you should imitate: J.A. Konrath, Amanda Hocking, John Locke. What do they have in common, besides luck? (Luck should never be discounted, because it is the biggest factor in any type of success--yes, that's unconventional, but it's true, and a topic for another post). They all came out swinging with multiple titles. Once they got hot, and the Amazon algorithms flooded your shopping window with their titles, it looked like they were successful and the books were selling well, so you better buy one or you're missing out.

Yes, it's that simple. Lots of books and some luck.

(Yes, I know John Locke talks about how he blogged his way to stardom and is happy to sell you a book on how to sell a million copies--even though Amazon algorithms did 99 percent of the selling for him. Yes, I know everyone EXCEPT Joe credits his prior New York paper career for his ebook success, even though he outsold New York this year on his own. Yes, I know people credit book blogs with Amanda Hocking's success, even though 10 blogs with 300 followers does not instantly convert into a million dollars.)

Okay, so we're not those guys. What do we have that we can use, since we're now smart enough and unconventional enough to not try to imitate them?

Go ahead and use Facebook, Twitter, and other social media outlets, but not to sell your book. And don't take the other bit of conventional wisdom that "You don't sell your book, you sell yourself and your brand." I take that one step further. Don't sell yourself. Give yourself away.

That means occasional book giveaways, of course, and freebies and bonus features and advice and cool links to things you find interesting. It means engaging in topical issues. (I know some writers who are deathly afraid of politics, religion, and romance--you know, the real stuff running all up and down the core of their books, the stuff people care about the most deeply, but those writers are afraid of offending that one potential customer). Sure, you don't want to be a jerk, but if you have a strong belief, better to lose the one and gain the 100 that agree or at least sympathize. And you'll be giving yourself away. Those who like the taste will eat more and the rest will just drive on down the virtual street.

Be yourself, the person who wrote your books. Write lots of books. Write blog posts and give them away. Answer every email. Respect your critics--even someone who doesn't like your work should be treasured if they take the time to share an opinion. Don't stalk them on the Internet and try to change their minds, or seek some sort of weird Internet revenge (Yes, I've seen this done).

Aside from being yourself, do what the million other indie writers AREN'T doing...buy ads! Yes, just like a real business. While your constant self-promotion gets annoying, we all know what ads are, and we never blame the advertiser for ads the way we blame people for constant self-promotion. Yes, it doesn't make any sense, but we're unconventional, see? I hate to give specific sites for ads because the best places are overbooked, and prices are increasing, but keep smart and keep your target audience in mind. You're on Facebook, but you don't really want to buy an ad on Facebook. Sure, there are 200 million people there, but they aren't there looking for your book to buy. But Goodreads? Readers. Book blogs? Readers. Newspapers? Don't even think about it. Radio? Stop it.

Here are some crazy things I tried, all of which worked to some degree, although not always in direct proportion to effort or cost: Goodreads giveaways, Librarything giveaways, freebie downloads, Facebook "sharing" contests, "follow me" contests, a 90-day book blog tour, a 10-blog tour on the same day, gift card giveaways, Be My Agent in which I paid book bloggers a percentage of that month's sales, purchased ads, book excerpt swaps, Twitter blitzes, and probably a dozen things that have already slipped my mind, because I use them and move on to the next. I am terribly disorganized. I keep track of things in a little pocket notebook with a pencil.

All of that sounds like more fun to me than tweeting "Buy My Book" 12 times a day to the same tired audience. If it feels like work, it's wrong. And there's another twist--the people that blast nothing but "Buy my book" are people I either unfollow or try to avoid. I don't trust their message. I am not even sure they have a message. Because they're not giving anything away. If that's all they have to say, why in the world would I want to spend an entire book with them?

Of course, the best advertising is already inside your book. Not just the story, but telling the reader about your other books. Trade around. Links will get more and more valuable as the tablet era evolves (we all agree the dedicated ereader only has a few more years of shelf life, right?) And here's the biggest unconventional marketing tip of the day: Instead of reading or following my marketing tips, invent one. Do something that has never been done before.

What do you have that you so desperately need to keep to yourself? Give it away today. Each gift is a building block to your own success and happiness.
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(You can buy The Indie Journey--although a lot of it you can read on the Internet for free if you look--and you can download Write Good or Die for free in every market and format. If you'd like to contribute an unconventional writing advice, please email it to graveconditions AT yahoo.com with links embedded and an image or two).

$100 donation

Thanks to contributors and those of you who have purchased Write Good or Die at Amazon, we were able to donate $100 to Literacy Inc. Thank you and a big thanks to Deborah Leblanc for starting the organization to inspire teens to read.

Sorry I haven't had time to fulfill the goal of making this an ongoing writer gathering spot. If anyone wants to take it on (and keep the charitable, benevolent goals) then please contact me at hauntedcomputer AT yahoo. Thanks!

Moving to Blood Red Pencil

Since I am now a member of Blood Red Pencil and contribute there, I encourage you to visit it regularly. It's maintained by a group of freelance editors and writers and offers much more information than I can here (and since it has nearly 900 followers, the debate is more lively and we'll all learn more.)

While this blog won't be updated anymore, the Write Good or Die download will remain free for download at Smashwords and Haunted Computer and for 99 cents at Amazon for Kindle. Any proceeds will still go to Literacy, Inc. Please enjoy and freely share the collection. Thanks for visiting and good luck with your writing.

"He said sincerely"

I hate adverbs. I especially hate -ly adverbs, as you may have noticed in my "suddenly" post. They do have their moments, but in general they slow down the verb they are seeking to modify or enhance, a giant, blood-sucking leech on the butt of your brilliant sentence.

"His frown grotesquely shifted into a grin." Yuck. How about, "His frown shifted into a grotesque grin." Or, if the sentences leading up to that sentence are doing their jobs, then "His frown shifted into a grin" may well be enough. When measuring the drag factor of your adverbs, there's a simple test--cut it out. See if you notice the loss. In most cases, I'll bet you won't.

"Slowly" is about the only one I can tolerate, but even then, your prose is likely strong enough to live without the crutch. "He slowly inched his way through the drain pipe." Well, how ELSE would he inch? Quickly? Measuredly?

"The door loudly banged open." "Bang" did the job. We get it.

"To boldly go where no man has gone before." No, let's go with great timidity to giant flaming holes in space.

Used in dialogue tags, all you are doing is admitting you don't have confidence as a writer, and don't trust your reader. The only time I'll support it is in parody or humor, when the line actually jars with the character's intent--"You'll obey my every command," he said meekly.

Adverbs. Do us all a favor. Let them die. Quickly, quietly, eternally. Sincerely.

Which adverbs would YOU like to kill?

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Brandon Massey

Brandon Massey has come on board with a few articles. Massey self-published his first novel, built his own audience, and parlayed it into a career writing thrillers for Kensington Books. Since the aim of Write Good or Die is to offer different perspectives, here's one of a self-pubber made good (though he will be the first to tell you you probably shouldn't try it!)

Massey is the award-winning author of several thrillers and story collections, including Dark Corner, The Other Brother, Don’t Ever Tell, and Vicious. He lives with his family near Atlanta, GA, where he is at work on his next suspense thriller. Visit him online at www.brandonmassey.com and sign up for his free newsletter, The Talespinner, to receive book news updates and writing tips.

Harley Jane Kozak

Okay, I now have all three of the Killerettes in Write Good or Die...which was the REAL mission of this project! (For those not aware of this obscure pop-cult reference, we were in the Killer Thriller Band that performed at the first Thrillerfest awards ceremony--I guess that was 2006).

With thirty-some plays to her credit, Harley Jane Kozak at age 19 headed for the Big Apple and into the professional acting program at NYU's School of the Arts Join the mailing list! (now Tisch School of the Arts). After completing the program, she was cast in the feature film The House on Sorority Row. This enabled her to retire her waitress shoes.

Then came a trio of principle roles in soaps—Texas, Guiding Light and Santa Barbara—that came to a smashing halt when Harley's final character (a nun) was crushed to death by the giant neon letter "C." But that "C" gig had gotten her to L.A., where she went on to star in feature films and prime time television programs. Ten years later she began to write novels, have babies and acquire dogs, cats, fish, and rabbits—and the rest, as they say, is history.

Harley currently lives with her family in Southern California, where she's working on an international thriller. Meanwhile, she's added teaching, blogging and public speaking to her resumé, exploiting her checkered past.

Heather Graham contributing

Bestselling novelist Heather Graham, who also writes as Shannon Drake, is contributing a cool piece on what it takes to be a writer. As a mother of five, she downplays excuses and encourages dedication and persistence.

New York Times and USA Today best selling author Heather Graham majored in theater arts at the University of South Florida. After a stint of several years in dinner theater, back-up vocals, and bartending, she stayed home after the birth of her third child and began to write, working on short horror stories and romances. Her first book was with Dell, and since then, she has written over one hundred novels and novellas including category, romantic suspense, historical romance, vampire fiction, time travel, occult and Christmas family fare. She wrote the launch books for the Dell's Ecstasy Supreme line, Silhouette's Shadows, and for Harlequin's mainstream fiction imprint, Mira Books.

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Clarifying supporting clauses

Clarity is one of the keys to effective writing. Confuse the reader once and she glances over at the television set, the XBox, the iPod, or the romantic interest. Confuse the reader two or three times and you might want to reconsider your future career as a the next Dan Brown or J.K. Rowling.

Stray clauses are one of the killers of awkward prose, and I've always preached that if you can function competently at the sentence level, all the rest can be learned through study and practice. We'll get to comma usage later, but for today, let's take a look at descriptive clauses.

I recently edited a manuscript sample that contained a sentence "He killed his wife and children as they were asleep in their beds with a shotgun." I can't be sure, but I assume the killer used a shotgun, not that the warm-and-fuzzy family cuddled up with shotguns and teddy bears at night. The sentence could be made clearer either by shifting the descriptive clause closer to the "acting agent" (the man who used the shotgun) or totally restructuring the sentence.

One possibility is "With a shotgun, he killed his wife and children as they slept." Simple and effective, though not very artful. Personally, I would build a little suspense and use a series of short sentences--"The shotgun was cold in his hands, but warmth radiated from his sleeping wife..."

My first draft of a newspaper story I wrote this morning contained the sentence "Watauga County Republican Party chairwoman Pam Blume encouraged her fellow party members to work hard during Saturday's meeting..." I immediately caught the error, because she wasn't asking conventioneers to work hard just for that hour on Saturday, she wanted them to work hard during the entire election year. I moved the clause to the beginning of the sentence and ended up with "During Saturday's convention, Watauga County Republican Party chairwoman Pam Blume encouraged her fellow party members to work hard in the election year."

The basic lesson is to place the supporting or related clause as close the the subject as possible. An ancillary lesson, learned through years of mistakes and revisions, is simply to not write anything you have to revise later. Leave out the bad parts. Write good.
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